There would be so much to say about these matters. I’ll focus on the perinea of which you have not talked much to my amazement. Just as “the eyes beckon intent”, that is, at once express and control our moods, the perinea regulates the pelvic energy. I dare say that it controls not only the sacral and lumbar plexuses but also the other two and therefore also the vagus… That is quite a claim but this is how I experience it.
(The perinea is the region between the genitals and the anus for those who would not know)
Maintaining the tonus of the perinea ever so lightly – therefore not tense in the negative sense – will balance the whole of one’s tensegrity, that is, the main lines of tensions that unify the body.
That tonus is just as important as the one of the eyes which you would/should not let phase out.
Maintaining that focus will immediately lower your center of gravity, warm the lower body and cool the upper part, add it should be, it will strengthen your center or gravity (haha) as suggested in so many traditions, tonify the abdomen as suggested in Tai Chi, and stimulate the coccyx, as suggested by… me.
Do try this at home.
This also probably works wonder for me as I also tend to focus the “meaning” of my eyes and coordinate it with my breath. But I know it’s not something “I do” but the naturalness of my holon that I only assist very lightly. As it’s proper in any energetic works.
This triple coordination is quite liberating and astounding when you experience it. The lower body is very well grounded and the upper part is free to rise like a serpent…
By the way, the coordination of breath and sight is the reason one should not do two things at the same time. I’m referring mainly to thinking and acting: they require different breaths.
“Gathering” my awareness, and therefore energy, at the perinea somehow voids my neurosis, if you see what I mean. In my case tension goes up, clogs my neck, and cuts my body in two at the diaphragm if I let my awareness drift in haze and/or start thinking erratically.
A second field of awareness to recommend then is the quick going back and forth from coccyx to fontanelle, as if you were really at the two point at the same time. This will make the spine supple and move smoothly with the breath.
That makes a lot of points to keep in mind and that’s a good thing as it will curtail or shut off any vain inner dialog, which calls the energy upward.
Wow. This was a lot of preamble to get to orgasm…
If you remember most of this during love-making and orgasm, things will flow of themselves…
I think you should indeed make sounds, perhaps a mmmm as if tasting something incredibly delicious, and also, you should release sighs of relief. You should also cry, not necessarily completely, just this tender sadness. This is all liberating the bad tensions for the good one, that I then call tonus.
I have this not so non-standard view that desire is pleasure in and of itself, but that one must enjoy it directly,, and dive the most completely into it. That’s tonus. So… there’s no rush for orgasm, which would then be incomplete anyway.
I also find that I need to breathe not only *through, but *with the whole body, and even outside of it, calling the breath from the feet, or at least, you guessed it, from the perinea.
I recently discovered that I should not try to direct my orgasm upward but more simply, and oddly, follow and push downward awareness and breath as I exhale. So preorgastic pleasure and orgasm, both as release, is a matter of exhalation. Then the exquisite desire is acute on the inhalation.
Finally, to cut off an orgasm abruptly gather back all its energy at the coccyx, either by calling it there from everywhere (and by inhaling) and mainly, I find, down the spine.
There is also much to explore with the rotation of awareness and energy, either down the front/up the back, or the opposite. But I lack assuredness in these techniques, so I’ll leave at that.
Ah well I’m happy to have provided Psychology Today with a free though unedited article. *laughing* This has helped me anyway, and it’s going to my blog. I hope I have helped complement the article.